Walking through my closet…

Every morning, it’s the same routine,
Wake up, make up, paint on a smile.
Take your feelings, put it in the closet,
Wave your happiness from a mile.

Walk out the door, greeting good wishes,
Killing within the dance rhythm.
Hug the dear ones, just like yesterday,
Have your sorrows digest within the system.

Hang out with your new best friends,
Anxiety and Trauma is all I scream.
Lie to self, everything’s fine,
Life is the nightmare, not a dream.

Control your emotions, while talking to strangers,
Do not lash out, is the only task.
Breathe heavily, in the closed dark room,
Suffocate, till I drop the mask.

Bite me, hit me, drag me on the floor,
Tie me up and take it away.
Its piling up, it’s eating me out,
That’s all I gotta say.


She makes me the one I dream to be

She comes to my home to work everyday
At the end, she always has the kindest words to say
Living a content life with whatever she gets
Teaching me happiness is what one sets
Just by being herself, a kind hearted lady
She makes me the better person, I dream to be

She sleeps at midnight and wakes up at six
Just so that I have in my lunch, the right mix
Working eighteen hours a day, all seven days of the week
Dying in pain but not letting out the tiniest shriek
Just by being herself, a working lady
She makes me the better son, I dream to be

She tied a rakhi on my hand every year
She protected me from even my silliest fear
Fulfilling the responsibilities of an elder brother
And nurturing me from time to time like my second mother
Just by being herself, a fierce lady
She makes me the better brother, I dream to be

She was born as a he, but she made her right choice
She has been through the struggle, so the rest could hear her voice
They call her an outcast, a threat to society
But she blesses them with full heart at every opportunity
Just by being herself, a true lady
She makes me the better human, I dream to be

She stands with the pois and speaks with compassion
Rising up from race and gender, teaching a love lesson
She strives to bring humanity back into the world
Anything that brings her down, is another thing hurled
Just by being herself, the courageous lady
She makes me the better man, I dream to be


The story of realisation of the true identity of a trans person

Looking at the society,
I learnt my lesson,
Every one of us is born,
To complete their mission

I was ready to give my best,
I was ready to fight,
But how could I go through,
When my body wasn’t right?

I learned to love my body,
So I could love everyone else,
I tried to be the person I am not,
I became what people thought of myself.

I wept and cried for days and nights,
As I was not being the one who I am,
I am not who I was supposed to be,
I failed at what they made me cram.

I rose up from what I have been afraid of,
I walked the road where my soul calls,
I have been living in the shadows for a while,
This is the moment, when the mask falls.

Now I can truly love existence,
As my identity is no more strapped,
I can move, run, fly as I want to,
My soul is free that was once trapped.

I’ll Remember

Your non-stop attempts to make me laugh,
The last slice of pizza that we shared in half,
The nick-names that we gave to each other,
Your endless love towards your mother,
Towards every thing, your weird perception,
The planning for the assissinations,
Your fear about walking in the dark,
Your favourite T-shirt making you the stark,
The first time, when I held your hand,
The date we thought, to walk in the sand,
The brushing together of our skins,
Times we comitted those adorable sins,
Your passion towards helping the world,
And the time, with each other we curled,
Thesea are just the memories that I’ll remember!



I just woke up from a beautiful dream,
But reality turned it into a nightmare,
The ground beneath me swept away,
Leaving me in pain and despair.

I didn’t know this when I jumped in,
I jumped because you were calling,
But you were standing on the ground,
And yet I’m still falling.

There’s nothing to do, there’s nothing to say,
All I’m left with is this void,
I wished I had felt this emptiness in you,
Before we had spent that night.

Trying to get to know you better,
I never recognized that you were stalling,
Now I’m just waiting to hit the ground,
Can’t believe, I’m still falling.

I will never forget you in my arms,
The times we spent with each other,
The times you made me laughed,
The times you made me love your own mother.

I was supposed to fall for you,
But you just went away crawling,
I must rise up and live without you,
But right now, I’m just falling.

Smile on my Face

The feeling when you figure out what makes you happy!

We were walking on the streets,nothing much of a deal,
You keep on complaining about the dirty road in real,
You give me the chance to adore your beauty and grace,
You are the one who brings the smile on my face.

It’s past one and I’m dreaming about our last meet,
You wake me up with the voice so charming and sweet,
I feel so happy when you catch up on this romantic chase,
You never fail to bring the smile on my face.

We’re out for the movies and there nothing lacks,
You get scared right when it’s  the time of the climax,
You reach out for my arm and my embrace,
You became the reason of the smile on my face.

We were at your place and you were cooking some food,
Music was on and your body was moving smooth,
You are the glamour that makes my heart race,
Please be there by my side, as the smile on my face.

The day with you 

Yesterday I did something, that I wouldn’t do,
To go out with someone as lovely as you.
There was the biggest question in front me,
That is this what I need, and is it true?

It was a bit scary, as it was my first date,
Will you be the one or like the others that I hate?
But the venue, the time and you were so perfect,
A memory so pure and in an everlasting state.

You were magnificent and everything I hoped for,
Every second that I spent with you, just made wanting more.
We took a walk upto your home, on the hot sunny day,
But everything just got better when we walked in through the door.

As phenomenal as you are, so was the food you made,
Nothing special, nothing exotic, just salt and pepper to your aid.
I was in a war with myself, is this what I really want,
But I was to win because in you I found the winning grenade.

There were pictures and pictures of people and cherry dips,
Then the magic happened when your lips touched my lips.
Then your lovely friends came and ruined the moment,
One second there were you and the other, the water sips.

Your friends sure knew, how to welcome me in,
They had me relive your memories, from vodka to gin.
I got to see, who you really are, and you did not change a bit,
For the choice that I made in the beginning, surely was a win.

For now it was the time to leave, that I didn’t want to be true,
I get up, say bye, and start wearing my shoe.
For the moment to last an eternity I desire,
I kiss you goodbye and end the the day with you.

The Dream that wasn’t

Standing there was I alone,
with nothing but a feeling within me.
Even when all the bonds were broken ,
even when I was all free.

The bonds that meant for everything,
are now shredded into pieces.
The vows that meant to last forever,
are now lying in forbidden niches.

The one’s who were supposed to,
didn’t stay till the end.
Breaking me into a million,
became a brand new trend.

The word trust lost its meaning,
that was just said a week ago.
The day of darkness that it built,
had the sands of time to drop slow.

The promises made, the sacrifices done,
just to make them once again smile.
Had pushed me along a new road,
that was longer than a thousand miles.

The letters that secured my privacy,
were endangered by a word called friend.
The crime that I’ve been inflicting on other,
Suddenly became their amend.

Opening my eyes won’t have any effect,
cause there i was already awaken.
That I haven’t been dreaming all the time,
for reality is the nightmare that cannot be broken.